Mother-In-Law Weekend

So, this weekend Josh was working since they were having a big sale at Lexus. For Mother's Day we gave my mother-in-law a pedicure. I told her we would go together the Saturday after Mother's Day. I called her Saturday morning and arranged it all. She asked if I minded that we do some other running around while we were out. I went to her house and we did the pedicures first. On the way there, she asked me if I remembered giving her a gift card for a manicure/pedicure for her birthday last year. I had told Josh the day before that I bet she hadn't used it. And indeed, she still had the gift card, so she used it for her pedicure and I took her to lunch for her Mother's Day gift. After the pedicures, which she loved by the way, we went to lunch at Mimi's and then to the mall to get my father-in-law some new shoes for his birthday. All in all, the day went really well. Her and I have never ever spent so much time together and alone at that. I must admit that we don't have the same taste, so it's a little difficult when she asks if I like something that she really likes and I just don't. I hope this is the beginning of the bitter feelings being over. I hate feeling like I don't like people, especially when they haven't really done any wrong against me they're just different people.
On a baby note, Josh and I had decided a month or so ago that this month would be my last month of the pill and we would start trying for the baby starting next week. Well, we bought a house (or are in the process of buying a house) last week. Now he's having some doubts about trying for the baby. So many people say that if you're waiting until your financially ready to have a baby, you never will. I want more than anything to be a stay-at-home-mom and right now, I know we couldn't do it. But I believe God has placed that desire in me and when He placed that desire in me He had to make a way for it to come to pass. Now that we're buying a house, it seems even more of an impossibility but I serve a God that can do the impossible. So, I have an appointment with the gyn. in two weeks and we decided to wait until I get the all clear from her to go ahead and start the baby making process. I guess it's a compromise, one more month. I think it will work out ok, since then we'll be married for almost exactly 3 years.

Exciting News!!!

Josh and I are buying a house!! This will be our first house ever and we are so very excited. We signed the paperwork yesterday and hopefully the house will be ready in August. We've been looking for a house since before we got married and I guess it just wasn't the right time for us until now. I'm so glad that God's timing is perfect, even when I question it. Everything just kinda fell into place for us to get this house, we really didn't have to put forth much effort other than signing hundreds of papers:) I really feel like this is a new chapter in our lives and I'm so looking forward to it. Hopefully there will be a baby next......

On another note, I don't know if there are any of you girls out there with MIL issues. Mainly IL issues. My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years and I still don't think they like me. I keep praying that God will help me to love them like He loves them, but it's just not happening. Josh's dad's birthday is this weekend and since everyone has stuff going on, the only day we could all get together is Thursday and that is the day that I have worship team practice at church. While I don't want them to rearrange their plans just for me, it would be nice for his mom to say that she really wants me to be there. Part of me thinks that she just wants her boys back under her wing and no daughters-in laws allowed. I really struggle with this. Josh says that his mom loves me, but she never calls me and I kinda want her to be the one to open up to me. I've called her a few times, but I never really have much to talk about. When she talks to Josh, it's like he's her baby and I'm just in the background. We're talking about trying to get pregnant soon and I can't imagine what things are going to be like then. I guess I'm partly to blame for this whole thing. I just don't feel like I belong in his family and I love my family very much and have a great relationship with my mom. Josh's brother, Tim, has a girlfriend that he lives with who seems to have a really good relationship with my MIL and I'm sort of jealous. His girlfriend has family issues and so she vents to my MIL her problems and I just don't need to do that or care to do it. I'm taking my MIL for pedicures this weekend so I'll let you know how that goes. Anyone out there like this??? Am I crazy???

Frustrated!

Bible Study

So, I went to my regular Tuesday night Bible Study last night. I have to admit that I was beginning to feel like this Bible Study wasn't for me. It was a little discouraging because everyone else would say how much they loved it and I was like, really? Well last night was for me. Kay Arthur was speaking and she really hit home. I know we all sin and we all ask forgiveness, but I sometimes don't realize what I'm doing is sin. For example, obviously lying is sin. Would you consider not trusting God as sin? I would have said it wasn't sit before last night, but Kay Arthur said that not having faith in God is sin. I sort of cringed when she said that. That really hit home. I've been struggling with faith for years. It's something I've never felt like I've mastered. I don't know if you ever do, but I know God has been trying to speak to me about having complete faith in Him, even when I don't understand what is going on.

I got home and told my husband about all I had learned and he too was a little surprised at what I had learned. Who thinks of sin like that? We all know murder, stealing, lying, etc. are sins, but not having faith? And then to top it all off Kay says that when we sin, we despise God and His Word. WOAH! I don't know what I signed up for, but it was not this:) This just gives a whole new look to what sin looks like to me. It was definitely a wake up call and I haven't had one of those in a while.

Just another day.......

So, after seeing so many great and interesting blogs I thought I'd give it a try. It's supposed to be therapeutic right?? A little about me:
*I've been married to a wonderful man, Josh, for almost 3 years. He pretty much rocks my world!
*We live in a 1 bedroom apartment and so would like to have a house.
*We (mostly me) want to have a baby so very much. Hopefully it will happen this year. It's like I'm craving a baby:)
*I love God with everything in me, He makes going through this life so much easier.
*I love my new friends at Desert Springs Church, they make me feel so loved every time I see them.
*I really enjoy my job, but my dream is to be a stay at home mom.
*I'm really working on trusting God in every aspect of my life. I know He has great things in store for Josh and I.
*I struggle with having both sets of parents being so close to us sometimes, while I love them I sometimes wish we weren't so close (in proximity, is that terrible?).

So I'm really going to try and keep up with this. It will be a good thing, I'm sure.