Baby Making:)

Well, this is my first month not on birth control for about 4 years. I was kinda worried that I might be different somehow. My husband has only know me on these make me crazy pills. Lately I had been feeling like I was completely out of control with my emotions. Josh could say just about anything and I would find a reason to cry or have my feelings hurt in some way. I really was out of control. I had been praying that God would help me to have self control (a fruit of the spirit, so I should have it) so I could put my emotions in check. I would have a day or two where, if I really concentrated, my emotions would be under my control but then I would slide back down again to complete crazy. I know being emotional is a woman thing, but this was out of hand. I was also feeling like it was time to have a baby, so it all worked out for me to not be on these pills. I know some women can be on these pills for years and have no problems, but it just wasn't working for me.
I went to the doctor and got the all clear for baby making! Josh is a bit apprehensive and he says he doesn't want us to TRY to have a baby, just to let it happen when it happens. While I know that all of this is entirely in God's hands, how am I supposed to not TRY? We'll see. I definitely feel so much better, not being on the pill. I feel like if I'm upset about something, I could choose not to cry. I am feeling pretty tired, but I'm not sure if that has anything to do with the pill or not.
I've been so intrigued by my blogger friends with infertility woes. Everything about it is so interesting to me. I pray that I don't have to go through that, but I also pray that they would have strength and peace to make it through this difficult time. I really felt like I would get pregnant the first month off the pill and while that can still happen, I'm beginning to doubt that. I know God will bless us with a little one at the perfect time, but I pray it is soon. I'm hoping Josh will have a change of heart and actually want us to TRY and have a baby. I know it's more fun to not try really. I guess I'll find out next week if my first month feeling was right or not.